mind nobody, and soul

 I shaved the top of my head in a perfect round bowl shape

Cut open my skin with a little scalpel

Peeled the layers of skin to expose my bloody skull

Tapped it open with an icepick

Split open my head in half

Sandwiched my temple inbetwixt my palms

Popped out my brain with a pwah! and a bounce

And I stared at myself in the mirror

My brain perfectly intact and wired

I thought about every single word that I associated with you

Watched the neurons spark and flash and zip across my brain

Like standing from a balcony high up watching over the city

watching the lights of cars and trucks and motorbikes speeding across a busy highway at dawn, when the sky is pink and raw

You never stop wanting more

I laid down on my little futon

and like a vertical harakiri

I took that same little scalpel and opened up my body vertically from my chest to my my pubic bone for you to see

and yet there was still nothing there to look at